


Appetizer

by walkwithursus



Category: What We Do in the Shadows (TV)
Genre: Blood Drinking, Canon-Typical Violence, Consensual, Devotion, M/M, Pining, Temptation, Trust, Unresolved Emotional Tension, Vampire Bites, soft yet erotic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-04-25
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:34:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23826154
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/walkwithursus/pseuds/walkwithursus
Summary: When the virgin supply runs low in Staten Island, Guillermo offers himself to satisfy Nandor's craving.
Relationships: Guillermo/Nandor the Relentless (What We Do in the Shadows TV)
Comments: 48
Kudos: 406





	Appetizer

It had been nearly a fortnight since Nandor had last fed, and Guillermo was growing increasingly concerned.

Nandor could be a picky eater at the best of times, and for the moment the only thing that seemed to pique his appetite was the appeal of a fresh, pimply, socks-with-sandals virgin. This made things difficult for Guillermo. After ten years of service, Guillermo had definitively run out of virgins to feed his master — at least within a two hour radius. The Staten Island Community College LARP group had disbanded; the Barnes and Noble cafe, the local GameStop, the arcade in the mall, all picked clean. The Craigslist Missed Connections section had been an interesting, if unprofitable dead end, and Christian Mingle had turned out to be more mingle-y than Christian.

Nandor was literally (and dramatically) wasting away before Guillermo’s eyes. In the last few days Nandor had stopped hunting for himself, and Guillermo had taken to bringing back meals for him in the hopes that he might nibble on someone. So far he had had no such luck. Nandor turned them all away after little more than a cursory glance, and Guillermo was forced to send the humans packing, or worse, pawn them off on Colin Robinson. 

It was the eve of the fourteenth day since Nandor’s last meal, and darkness had fallen both literally and figuratively over the vampire residence. Nandor would be waking soon, and he was likely to be in a foul mood. After closing all the curtains, Guillermo made his way to his master’s chambers and began the arduous, half-hour long task of lighting the candles. Once the room was suitably prepared, Guillermo approached Nandor’s enormous wooden casket and rapped his knuckles gently on the lid. 

“It’s time to wake up now, Master,” Guillermo said. 

There was no response. 

“Master? Are you stuck again?” Guillermo asked at length, pausing to listen for noise within. 

Silence. 

Guillermo hesitated a moment before reaching out to undo the latch and lift the lid. He propped it open with both arms and peered inside. Nandor lay with his arms folded across his chest, his long, dark hair fanned out around his skull like an infernal halo. His pale face was wan and expressionless, and his long-lashed eyes were closed and slightly sunken.

“Go away, Guillermo,” said Nandor, his lips barely moving. “Can’t you see I am resting?”

“But it’s nightfall, Master,” Guillermo protested. “Don’t you want to get up?”

“What for? So I can be disappointed by yet another inedible human you drag into this house? No thank you.” 

Nandor’s displeasure never failed to wound Guillermo. Still, he wasn’t about to give up so quickly — Guillermo the Resilient, they would call him some day. 

“Can you at least get out of the coffin so we can talk about it?” Guillermo asked. His arms were beginning to shake under the strain of the casket lid, which was much heavier than Nandor made it seem.

“No,” said Nandor, still not opening his eyes. “I do not wish to talk.”

A response had barely begun to leave his mouth before Guillermo the Resilient’s strength gave out, and he dropped the lid with a resounding crash. Seconds later it flew open, and Nandor sat up at the waist to glower at his familiar. 

“What did you do that for?” Nandor asked petulantly, massaging the side of one ear. “That was really loud.”

“I’m sorry, Master,” Guillermo panted, collapsing back into a beige bergère. He had nearly crushed his fingers. “It was too heavy.”

Nandor made a disapproving noise halfway between a cluck and a sigh. Slowly, and with no real enthusiasm, the vampire rose from his coffin and stepped down onto the plush carpet to stand over Guillermo.

“Well, I’m awake,” Nandor said testily, putting his hands on his hips. “What is it you wanted to talk to me about?” 

Guillermo hastily stood up from his chair, though he barely reached Nandor’s shoulder. “I was wondering what you wanted to eat tonight,” he said. 

Nandor sniffed disdainfully and turned his face away. “Why do you keep asking me that? You know perfectly well what I want to eat.” 

“Virgins, yes. See, the thing is—”

“A particularly succulent one.”

“I know, but—”

“Never been kissed.”

“But—”

“Never even to have held hands.”

Guillermo zipped his mouth shut, deciding it was better to wait until Nandor was finished than to talk over him. Nandor chose that moment to fold his hands across his stomach, staring at Guillermo expectantly. 

“Oh, was that it?” Guillermo asked. “Right, well, it’s like I’ve been trying to tell you. Unfortunately, the supply of virgins seems to have, uh, run out.” 

Nandor blinked disbelievingly at him. “All of them?” 

Guillermo nodded.

“Well what about on your little smart computer?” Nandor asked brusquely, attempting a crude typing gesture with his hands. “Aren’t there virgins on the line?” 

Guillermo shook his head. “I’m sorry, Master. I’ve looked everywhere, but I can’t seem to find any.”

Nandor frowned, the lines of his face deepening severely. “So you are telling me there are no more virgins in the whole of Staten Island?” 

Guillermo hesitated. Disappointing his master hurt like a physical wound, as though a gaping hole had opened up in his chest. But the truth, the thing Guillermo had been debating whether or not to bring up for days now, was unlikely to be better received. 

There was one virgin left in Staten Island for Nandor to feed on, and his name was Guillermo de la Cruz. 

It was a long shot, to be sure. Nandor was fairly protective over his familiar, especially when it came to other vampires feeding on him. Even Colin Robinson had been forbidden to do so in Nandor’s presence, though he still occasionally snuck a taste during daylight hours. To suggest that Nandor break his own rule was absurd, unthinkable — and yet, in Guillermo’s mind, it seemed the most practical solution. 

Though, if he were honest with himself, there was a selfish part of Guillermo that cared very little for Nandor’s nourishment and mainly for the satisfaction of his own curiosity. In the past, he had found himself envying the humans Nandor brought back to the house, how he wooed and seduced them right up until the moment he bit them. Guillermo had often wondered what it would feel like to be bitten, to be fed on by Nandor, to be the object of so strong a desire… Of course, in most of these fantasies Nandor followed the act by offering some of his blood to Guillermo in return, but still, the fact remained.

Nandor would not be pleased with Guillermo’s suggestion. But Nandor was generally displeased with him lately, so what was one more log on the fire? 

“There is _one_ more,” Guillermo said slowly, forcing himself to meet Nandor’s gaze with a confidence he didn’t feel. “One more virgin in Staten Island.” 

For a moment Nandor stared at him in bewilderment, his heavy brow furrowed as he took in Guillermo’s insinuating expression. Suddenly his black eyes widened, and he took a step back, putting distance between himself and his familiar. 

“You?” Nandor asked, his voice rising in disbelief. “No, Guillermo. Absolutely not. How could you even suggest such a thing?”

Guillermo wasn’t sure whether to be flattered or offended by Nandor’s point-blank refusal. “It’s my duty to take care of you,” he replied defensively.

“Not like this!” Nandor cried, shaking his head in distress. “I would never ask this of you. You know that.”

“But you aren’t asking,” Guillermo reasoned, taking a small, plaintive step forward, the physical manifestation of pushing his luck. “I’m offering myself to you.” 

“What you are offering is unacceptable,” Nandor argued, retreating another foot. “You are asking me to _take your life._ ” 

Guillermo shook his head. “Not my life. Just my blood. Enough to regain your strength, so you can hunt for yourself again.” 

There was a beat of silence in which Guillermo fought to get his breathing under control. Nandor had not said yes, but he had not said no, either. Actually, he _had_ said no, come to think of it, but Guillermo chose to look at it as a 'soft no.' In a stroke of bravery, Guillermo reached up and popped the buttons on his collar, hoping desperately that Nandor wouldn’t notice the way his hands shook. 

Nandor passed his tongue over his teeth as his eyes roved over Guillermo’s exposed skin, clearly tempted. “What if I am unable to stop myself?” he whispered, taking a cautious step forward.

“I trust you,” Guillermo said, even as his stomach roiled with nerves. 

Nandor had never looked at him this way before, so covetously, the depths of his black eyes molten with desire. Slowly, the vampire approached until they were only inches apart. Nandor’s long fingernail skimmed Guillermo’s chubby cheek, leaving a thin, burning trail in its wake. Guillermo suppressed a shiver of fear and focused on the warm coil of anticipation in his core. 

“Just a taste,” Nandor whispered, his breath ghosting across Guillermo’s skin as he pressed in closer. Guillermo wasn't sure if Nandor was talking to him or to himself. 

Nandor’s body was strong and solid, a bracing weight as he pressed Guillermo back against the wall. Guillermo couldn’t have resisted if he wanted to, and he realized with a jolt how gentle Nandor must struggle to be with him at all other times, not unlike a human handling a bird. Guillermo closed his eyes, his breath coming in short, fast bursts. Long fingers slid into his hair and pulled his head to one side, exposing the sensitive curve of his throat. 

Time seemed to stretch between them, suspended indefinitely with the vampire poised to strike. At last a rough, guttural moan exited Nandor’s throat and his fangs punctured the skin of Guillermo’s neck. The pain was immediate, a sharp, powerful sting that gradually dulled to a pulsating ache as Nandor began to feed. Guillermo clenched his fists in the front of his master’s thick fur robe so as not to fall, though he didn’t imagine Nandor’s strength would waiver for a second under his weight.

Everything _burned._ It was as if all the veins in Gueillermo's body had been set on fire, and he wondered wildly if Nandor was venomous. Nandor pressed in tighter, wrapping his free arm around Guillermo’s soft waist and crushing him close. With their bodies flush together, Guillermo could smell the fragrant oils combed into Nandor’s hair, argan and macadamia, and underneath that something sharper, metallic and briney like the ocean; the scent of his own blood.

Guillermo swooned. His head was beginning to feel very light, and he no longer felt as if his feet were touching the ground. The greedy, sucking swallows and Nandor’s low, pleasure-filled grunts were the only thing to reach his ears, though Guillermo thought he could hear the pounding of his own heartbeat, which seemed to be slowing, slowing, slowing...

With a reluctant moan, Nandor wrenched himself off of Guillermo and flung himself backwards across the room. Guillermo slumped heavily to the floor. His vision was blurring at the edges, fading rapidly from grey to black.

When next his eyes opened, Guillermo was staring at the familiar ceiling of his closet-bedroom under the stairs. He sat up slowly, his body sore and leaden with fatigue. A quick glance at his watch told him it was 9 am. Morning. Where had the time gone? 

After a cursory check on the nearest curtains, Guillermo made his way unsteadily to the bathroom down the hall. As he washed his hands he got his first glimpse of himself in front of the mirror. The bar of soap clattered into the sink.

Guillermo's complexion was dull, his normally flushed cheeks devoid of color. A square linen bandage had been taped to the side of his neck. Guillermo tugged at the tape to peer underneath, hissing as the adhesive peeled away from his skin. Two black puncture marks slowly became visible in the center of a nasty purple bruise. 

Memories came flooding back of the night before, along with a wave of nauseous anxiety. Guillermo couldn’t remember anything after Nandor had bit him. He didn’t even know how he had gotten back to his room, or who had dressed his wound. Nandor was likely to be very angry with him. As soon as Guillermo was well enough to withstand it, he was certain to hear an earful of his master's displeasure. The thought washed any lingering traces of satisfaction at having been bitten from Guillermo's mind.

At the very least, he could try not to give Nandor anything else to complain about. Donning his tallest turtleneck sweater, Guillermo set out about the day’s chores with all the energy that remained to him. There was much to be done; the locked room full of half-drunk victims had been decimated, while half a dozen fresh corpses littered the library, fancy room and hallway.

“That was some wild night, wasn't it?” 

Guillermo whirled around to find Colin Robinson standing in the doorway behind him, hands in his cardigan pockets. 

Guillermo breathed an irritated sigh of relief. “Jesus, you scared me." 

“Sorry," said Colin, not sounding sorry at all. "I was just remarking what a wild night it was last night. Boy, I sure wouldn't want to be in charge of cleaning up this mess. But I guess that's what you're doing here, huh?” 

Guillermo didn’t dare comment as he retrieved the designated body-wheelbarrow from a hall closet. “Do you know what happened?” he asked instead, trying to keep his interest under wraps. The moment Colin sensed someone cared about something he had to say, a thirty second story turned into a two hour ordeal.

“Oh, that’s right, you weren’t here for it. Nandor went a little crazy last night. Guess he’d waited too long in between feedings. Stopped a minivan as it was driving past the house and slaughtered everyone.” Colin chuckled lifelessly. “It was a bloodbath.”

Guillermo smirked to himself as he began hefting bodies into the wheelbarrow, his thoughts consumed with the image of a ravenous Nandor draining eight bodies in one night. Perhaps Nandor wouldn't be angry with him after all. How could he be, when Guillermo had finally unlocked the secret to stimulating his appetite?

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Kudos and comments greatly appreciated.


End file.
